Newsletter for April 2009: Highway to Happiness
Table of Contents:
Strictly Business: Your Impersonal Dream
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Fulfillment, joy and happiness seem to come from making a positive difference. I think we focus too much on the things we want, and not enough on the things we have to share. Many years ago, Jesus said, “It is better to give than to receive.” Based on many observations, from the Dalai Lama to Mother Theresa and my own “best moments,” I think there is truth in that. If you want happiness, give more of yourself.
Last month I wrote about the “pursuit” of happiness. This month, I want to talk about not just “pursuing” it but actually being happy! I think there’s a big difference.
Based on the feedback, two things stood out in last months newsletter. First, readers reacted to my statement that happiness might be a “skill” to be learned rather than a feeling that occasionally happens to us. Second, there was reaction to my separating “happiness” from material possessions or success. (You can read my thoughts on happiness at: http://www.rodgerblaker.com/read-newsletter/Life-Liberty-and-the-Pursuit-of-Happiness.htm
For Thomas Jefferson and the signers of the Declaration of Independence, the “pursuit of happiness” meant primarily the right to pursue wealth. They were concerned about life, liberty, and the freedom to pursue their interests as farmers or merchants. Today, we think of happiness very differently.
For most of us happiness is either an emotion (“I feel happy”) or an on-going sense of fulfillment and satisfaction with our lives. I’m more interested in the longer-term. I want a lifetime of happiness! Sure, I enjoy moments of happiness during a party or on the back of a horse, but it’s so short-lived! I want the long-lasting variety!
For me, the bigger and more interesting question is, “Can I achieve a life-time of happiness and personal fulfillment? Is that possible?” I believe the answer is a resounding YES! You CAN be happy most of the time, for the rest of your life.
How?
First, decide to be happy. Abraham Lincoln, who struggled with depression his entire life said, “Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” Happiness seems to begin with a desire to BE HAPPY! Most people focus their time and thoughts on getting things done, on achieving various goals or avoiding failure. And, there’s nothing wrong with that, but in the process they forget to focus on being happy. Choose happiness as a project or goal or value, and focus on it. Take time to be happy every day.
Second, notice what makes you happy. Most of us know what makes us laugh or feel giddy for an evening, but we’re not as certain about what brings long-term happiness. What fills you with pride or satisfaction? What gives your life meaning and purpose? What people, places, activities and values bring peace of mind, contentment or fulfillment? Note these and see if they could play a larger role in your life.
Third, happiness is active, not passive. Happiness seems to come from living our values and priorities. Happiness comes from doing valuable and worthwhile things, from making a positive difference in our world. We all know the frustration of spending a hectic day being frantic over trivial things. Don’t spend your life that way! Every day, invest some time doing things of ultimate value. Do things that reflect who you are and what you stand for.
Finally, happiness is more about giving than receiving. I’ve been blessed to have many things, and there are even more things I want in life. And of course, in small ways, many of these things do “make me happy.” I enjoy them! But few of my “things” actually seem connected to my long-term happiness. I suspect we focus too much on the things we want, and not enough on the things we have to share. Many years ago, Jesus said, “It is better to give than to receive.” Based on many observations, from the Dalai Lama to Mother Theresa and my own “best moments,” I think there is truth in that.
If you want happiness, give more of yourself.
Quotes of the Month
"No person was ever honored for what he received. Honor has been the reward for what he gave." -- Calvin Coolidge
"Be faithful in small things because it is in them that your strength lies." -- Mother Teresa
"Try not to become a man of success but rather try to become a man of value." --Albert Einstein
"What a pity that so many people rather believe their doubts and doubt their beliefs. Why don't we just decide to have no doubts, and believe our beliefs! Fear and worry are just the misuse of the creative powers we originally got to dream." -- Jannie Putter
Strictly Business: Your Impersonal Dream
I recently read Michael Gerber’s new book, Awakening the Entrepreneur Within, and it touched me. He makes a vital distinction between our personal dreams for success, wealth, fame or whatever, and the “impersonal dream” that lies behind every great business.
An impersonal dream is our belief that what we do will make an essential difference to the whole world. When he launched Microsoft, I’m sure Bill Gates had a personal dream that included things like money, influence, a nice house, a new car and so forth. He certainly didn’t launch Microsoft with a dream of failing!
But he also had an impersonal dream that made all the difference. He wanted “a computer on every desktop.” He dreamed of a world where ordinary people could harness the power of computers to communicate and produce. He had an impersonal dream that his little operating system could open doors he knew nothing about on every desktop and in every office around the world. Now that’s a dream!
Your business needs such a dream. Gerber argues that starting a business to make money or to employ people is nice, but it’s not enough. To keep going when things are tough requires a sense of mission, an impersonal dream that your shop, your book or factory or restaurant will ultimately touch thousands of people in a vital way.
What’s your “big idea?” If a million people copied your idea or bought your products or used your service, how would that change the world?
When managers and owners, entrepreneurs and inventors have huge “impersonal” dreams their businesses flourish because their sense of mission makes everything better.
What’s your impersonal dream to make this small planet just a little bit better? Find it and your business will take on new meaning, and perhaps, new profits.
I’ve seen most of these before, but they still make me laugh and groan and, well, they make me happy! I love this sort of word play and I hope they bring you as many chuckles as they gave me. Enjoy!
* I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.
* Police were called to a daycare, where a three-year-old was resisting a rest.
* Did you hear about the guy whose left side was cut off? He is all right now.
* The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference.
* To write with a broken pencil is pointless.
* When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.
* A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.
* A thief fell in wet cement. He became a hardened criminal.
* Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.
* We'll never run out of math teachers, because they always multiply.
* When the smog lifts in Los Angeles, U C L A.
* The geologist discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground.
* If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory.
* A dentist and a manicurist fought tooth and nail.
* A boiled egg is hard to beat.
* He had a photographic memory which was never developed.
* A plateau is a high form of flattery.
Rodger Blaker works with executives, small business owners and professionals who want to grow in their business and create an extraordinary life!
For info on resources for your success, visit: http://www.rodgerblaker.com or call me at 214-485-2238.
Please forward this copy to your friends and colleagues! That's how I grow!